Je n'aime pas dans les vieux films américains quand les conducteurs ne regardent pas la route. Et de ratage en ratage, on s'habitue à ne jamais dépasser le stade du brouillon. La vie n'est que l'interminable répétition d'une représentation qui n'aura jamais lieu.

Star Wars Chronology: Tales of the Jedi: The Golden Age of the Sith 0: Conquest & Unification!

Tales of the Jedi: The Golden Age of the Sith, #0 (July, 1996)

Tales of the Jedi: The Golden Age of the Sith, #0 (July, 1996)

Buy Tales of the Jedi, Vol. 1

5,000 BBY

*Editor’s Note:  Okay, so first things first here.  I began this chronological project quite a few years ago now; when I first began this project, this particular work, The Golden Age of the Sith, was the earliest work on the timeline, so at this point we get into some dicey territory, namely some very old reviews written by me back when I was *ahem* not so excellent a writer as I am now. 

Editor’s Note:  There was also some confusion on my part about the formatting/style/intent of the reviews.  At the time I wrote the old review that I’m posting (with copious new comments), I wasn’t really giving summaries of the works at hand, so I’ve taken in hand to expand the review a bit with Editor’s Notes. 

*Editor’s Note:  I can hear you now: “Well, then why are you posting this ancient review if it has so many problems?”  Well, first of all, it is an official review I wrote for this very project and I hate to go back and just wipe it off the map.  Secondly, I get into a groove fairly quickly – the reviews start getting longer, better and more like my current writing fairly quickly.  So, this is a way to get a quick review of the work at hand and also to see the way I evolved as a writer.  Enough preface; let’s get to the review.  Expect to see lots of editor’s notes though.

*Okay, five thousand years?!? Is this trip really necessary?

*Editor’s Note: As I think I mentioned back in my review of . . . whatever the heck it was that I reviewed about Cope Shykrill, when I first started this project, I thought it was kind of stupid that the EU would expand as far as it did; I thought that 5,000 years before the movies seemed a little extreme and pointless.  Of course, now the EU has expanded to more than 25,000 years before the movie; I stand by my opinion that this is kind of dumb and that no one in their right mind actually cares about this stuff.  Of course, what do I know?

*And right out of the box, a work by Kevin J. Anderson. This is not going to be easy.

*Seriously, the time period is this work's biggest strength. It realistically takes the movies and says, "Now. Let's go back in time a LONG ways. How do things look?" This book definitely gives us a GFFA that looks very different from the films, yet remains recognizable.

*Editor’s Note: Revisiting this story not too long ago, I was struck by just how great the art really is.  The story is a load of stupid, but the art is really absolutely incredible: finely detailed, esoteric, strange.  Anyway, the point needs to be made, I think, that nothing else in Star Wars has ever looked this primitive.  Works that came after this, some even taking place before this one, would steadfastly refuse to acknowledge that the GFFA was really this backwards.  Stuff like Crosscurrent and The Lost Tribe of the Sith seem purposely calibrated to make it appear that the GFFA of 5,000 years before ANH actually  wasn’t that different from the GFFA of the movies.  I think this is a mistake, frankly; like I say, it’s the strange, primitive nature of the GFFA at this point that is really the only good thing about these comics. 

*Editor’s Note: So, as this story begins, the Empress Teta is putting down some rebellious planets.  Or the rebellions at least.  We’re introduced to our main characters, a pair of flighty siblings name of Gav & Jori Daragon.  Their parents are killed running supplies through a war zone, but ultimately, Empress Teta is victorious and the galaxy seems poised to entire a period of peace & prosperity.

*Cue running and screaming, right?  Right. 

Kevin J. Anderson, Chris Gossett, Stan Woch, Sean Konot, Pamela Rambo, Christopher Moeller

* out of **** stars. 

*Next time, it’s the next issue in this weird series.  Join me for that!

Star Wars Chronology!